The Joy of Giving



I personally like to give presents and it gives me great satisfaction. However, when it comes to receive them, I feel surprisingly ambarassed. On the day of my birthday, a colleague at work, a very critical guy which always argue with me decided to challenge me! He put a packet of my favorite Lindt chocolate on my desk with a lovely card on it saying: "Please have a chance to taste how sweet our friednship can be, despite all our disputes. Happy Birthday, Yours, Michael”.



This time it was real hard to get that present. Despite the fact that I usually feel uncomfortable about getting presents, this time the giver is my so-called "enemy" at the office. Nevertheless that was an opportunity to take a different look at thing and change my attitude towards people. I adopted positive thinking and took a more tolerant position.


I took the chocolate and praised Michael for his surprising gesture showing sympathy. He didn't expect such a reaction from my side and he was surprised as well. Since then, there was a shift in our working relationship and it was the start of a friendship. It wasn't the chocolate itself but it was the notion that it communicated.

The same as breathing action involves inhaling and exhaling air which is essential for our physical existence, the same is true for our soul. We all the time engaged in the acts of giving and taking from our surrounding circles, may it be family, friends, colleagues and so on. That might explain why the basic human notion of giving and receiving gifts is deeply rooted in our everyday life

We all the time exchange ideas, thoughts, intentions, feelings, knowledge, money and whatever you can think of may it be tangible or intangible. One way to communicate our feelings is through the give and take of gifts. Gifts imply a social intention rather than a materialistic interest. We are all engaged in establishing and strengthening social relationships through giving and taking of gifts. We express our attachments and communicate cordiality through the purchase of gifts. French anthropologist Claude Levi-Strauss tells how, in inexpensive restaurants in the south of France, two strangers often share a small table at lunch. They eat their food separately but treat the carafe of wine set at each plate very differently. One person lifts his or her own carafe and pours the wine into the other's glass. The neighbor then reciprocates.

Most of us wish to have a mutual and balanced relationships. We all wish to have such relationships because it makes us feel happy and satisfied. We all have that natural expectation to give and receive and that is true for many aspects of our lives such as at work, in marriage life, in friendships and with respect to our parents and children. Mutual relationships give us confidence and let us the freedom to channel emotions and feelings through our behavior. Most of us take the initiative through the act of giving. Gifts are a tangible way to channel our feelings of appreciation, love and gratitude and we commonly do that. Most of us build expectations system and when we speak of gifts, people usually don't fail to meet expectations and when you give a present, you will wait for the opportunity to reward and vice versa.

There are many occasions throughout the year when gifts are traditionally given and received and there are those special days that we celebrate personal milestones. Anniversaries, birthdays and holidays are special occasions, but they're not the only times when giving a gift brightens the day. Celebrating a long friendship or shared accomplishment can renew and strengthen relationships with friends and family.

Be sure to note upcoming events like graduation, new job, promotion or well-deserved retirement on your calendar. Be sure to add new occasions as they occur. Personal milestones such as a first recital, finishing an important work project, quitting smoking, losing weight or passing the bar exam deserve a gift of recognition. A personalized gift adds to the sense of accomplishment and increases the enjoyment of a job well done.


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