Being interesting, or entertaining may get you dates. But don't count on anything happening just because you made her laugh and smile. Even if you're very good at it you are just another guy who is taking a shot at her affections. This is not a good place to be.

It is a fact that women will date interesting men because they have a better chance of entertaining them and being good company, but that does not make these men the object of desire. You may be a cool guy but if you are too active in making things happen, then she is the one with the power. In other words, she will interpret all your game, personality, etc., as above average means to impress her, and she will have a small tolerance for mistakes. I've been in this situation too many times to count. So, coming in strong with good game does not necessarily make you a winner. To be a winner (the prize) you have to make that same woman work for you using that same game, personality, etc., as bait.

Calling her, asking her out, setting up a date/meet etc. risks triggering a Pavlovian response where she begins to expect things from you. And when you don't give these things to her and impress her in the way she expects she will consider your performance "poor". This is why you have to set things up from the very beginning in the right way, because once you flip that switch in her head that tells her you are going to be a certain way, true or not, it is very hard to go back.

Copyright © 2007 Vittorio Norman

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